SO...evidently, the trend in the past 5 years (approximately) is this compilation of major label artists taking big spills on stage. I'm not talking about pouring out liquor for a lost homie either. I'm speaking of the various slips and falls that we've seen swimming around cyberspace. From Beyonce, to Kelly, to Michele, to Jazmine, to Drake, to Rihanna, to Lady GaGa, and the most recent Alicia Keys back-buster, for some reason, many of our mainstream folks can't seem to keep it together. Either that or we've just recorded alot more of these folks' mistakes than we used to. However, I'm more inclined to lean towards the fact that Pop culture has forgotten to teach alot of the newer artists basic stage movement before throwing them into a worldwide tour w/full-out choreography. As they say, you have to crawl before you walk, and in this case, before you dance or strut across a proscenium. So, as someone who has studied Body Movement, Stage Movement, and Stage Deportment under professional tutelage, allow me to import some common-sense pointers for anyone looking to step foot on a stage any time soon.
We'll break this down by sex, but all of these could apply to both genders. I just noticed these traits amongst men & women respectively.
MEN
1.) USE A NORMAL WALK: Stop attempting to use anything but your normal gait (that means stride, folks) on stage. In other words, if you don't already have a West Coast pimped out swagger-walk, your show or tour is not the time to start one up. Physically, once our bodies get into a movement routine when traveling, breaking out of it in some asinine way is only asking for trouble, particularly when we're already having major distractions thrown at us (e.g. the crowd, the band, the DJ, etc.). Assuming that you're that nimble on your feet will only have you end up on your face.
2.) KEEP YOUR KNEES BENT: This may sound stupid, but it's true. If for some reason you're at a point in your show/gig where you have to stand still and straight for an extended period of time, locking your knees while doing so can cause your legs to weaken, and in the occasional case, make you fall out. Keeping a slight bend in the knee forces your leg muscles to stay attentive and retain your good balance. Like I said, it's common sense, but clearly it's not that common.
3.) WEAR APPROPRIATE CLOTHING: I don't care what genre your working out of, your show is not the time to attempt physically restrictive or obstructive clothing. This means your pants should NOT sag below the cuff of your shoe, the cuffs themselves should be properly cut or taken up, and your shoes should have a SOLID grip on the ground. Just because your Louis Vuitton sneakers are fresh out of the box, doesn't mean they won't give way during a step-turn or short-stop.
4.) EYE-OBSTACLES: OK fellas, I get that maybe before your show you might've had a drink or five, and possibly taken part in some medical drug use, and that this would prompt you to put on your 'stunna' shades. While ultimately I thoroughly detest obstructive eye-wear for many reasons, if you're going to put on sunglasses, make sure that they fit comfortably on your head and have the best/clearest visibility possible. The same precaution goes for hats; pushing your brim down halfway in front of your eyes is your way of saying, "Well, I can kinda see, and I really don't care if I bust my ass." Give yourself a chance guys, seriously.
WOMEN
1.) BE A STICKLER ABOUT YOUR WARDROBE: Ladies, chances are you all will be getting the more involved end of the stick when it comes to stage fashion. As such, now is the time to be that b***h (politely, if possible though) about making sure that every article of clothing or accessory that is put on you for your gig is generally comfortable (and that's a BROAD term I'm using, I know how it is, LOL), and that you're COMPLETELY comfortable in it (THAT'S the more important part of this). The point of this advisory comes down to this: if you're on stage performing and simultaneously worrying about your couture spangled belt slipping off, your brain is no longer focused on your performance or your balance. It's an open invitation for a slip-and-fall disaster. If ever there was a time to be a diva during your career, wardrobe and costuming selection/fitting is definitely it.
2.) WEAR YOUR HAIR, DON'T LET IT WEAR YOU: Gals, whatever style they have your mop in, again, make sure it's something that you can deal with during a full show. Many of you will be dealing with hair extensions, weaves, wigs, and various hat wear. Take some time to really work out your hair/hat choices, and if you have time to rehearse in them, do so. There's nothing worse than getting a flyaway track in your eye, only to remove it AFTER you've plopped your butt on the stage because you were trying to remove it while performing.
3.) LIVE IN YOUR SHOES: This is probably the most important point I wanted to make for the women. Whatever shoes & footwear will be a part of your set, **REHEARSE IN THEM**. If you can't get a hold of those specific shoes (due to their high cost or availability), do yourself a favor and purchase a few pairs of character shoes. Start walking in them in and out of rehearsal to increase your comfort level of being in heels during a performance as opposed to your day-to-day routine; I promise you it's a far different experience. If they are closed-toe heels and you can swing it, pick up a pair of Dr. Scholls inserts: you may not have any foot problems to begin with, but no one said it was illegal to provide yourself with some added comfort during your show (they ARE heels after all). Finally, if you are NOT comfortable in your shoes...and this may shock some of you...DON'T WEAR THEM. PERIOD. Your foot care and posture are not worth you dealing w/excruciating pain or toppling over in some 6-inch Loubitin spiked-heel platforms if you don't have that kind of foot control.
Overall, the main sticking point to ensuring a fall-free gig or tour set is being aware of your body and your surroundings. Even after your full dress rehearsal, take a moment to yourself to walk around your stage area and observe everything that will be a part of the set. I can't tell you how many times I and so many others have bumped into a piece of scenery or wing that we could've SWORN wasn't there during rehearsals. As noted above, it is NOT uncommon for the modern-day entertainer to enjoy a pre-show drink...or whatever. But getting completely boshed, toasted, zooted, wasted, trashed, twisted, faded, to the point of incoherent movement doesn't help anything about what you're trying to do in your show. Finally, if during your show, you find that your senses are telling you that you're in danger of bodily injury due to a missed step, missed cue, or faulty props, STOP and REMOVE yourself from that danger. Singers in particular, please note that: If you miss even 64 counts of your choreo because your legs felt like they were giving way, but kept on vocalizing properly and delivered the song, it would be hard pressed for someone to really complain about it (other than maybe your choreographer, but you can fire him)...so long as the song is delivered. We know the show must go on, but not at the expense of your health, well-being, or embarrassment.
I hope this helps some of you, and I wish all my colleagues and fellow entertainers safe shows and amazing performances. I guess it would be really tacky to say, "Break a leg?' Oh well, I just did.
Womp womp.
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